In my last iHeal Mag article, I explored the concept of allowing ourselves to choose whether or not to procrastinate. Accepting and allowing there to be conflicting desires between wanting to do the task and avoiding the task. But what if you want to move through the avoidance?
Embracing what is
Remember Jane the ToDo list addict and Jill the adrenaline junkie? What I’m learning is that these parts of my mind serve different functions. I have always identified more with Jane, who I think of as being more of my doctor persona. She is the responsible rule follower who is organized, gets things done, and always has her act together. I’m just getting to know my inner artist Jill, who loves to learn and grow, who craves color and beauty and who is endlessly creative.
My mom brain has learned that experiencing fear and avoidance is just part of the human condition
I’ve spent most of my life beating myself up for not being a more perfect version of Jane while repressing Jill’s messy, disordered, rebellious nature. But the more I tried to hide her, the more Jill kept popping up randomly. As I’ve been on this journey of self discovery through coaching, I am rediscovering Jill as my free-spirited childish soul who is full of laughter, emotion and love.
And that’s not to say that Jane doesn’t still have an important role to play in getting me through the day to day.
Getting on with it
When I think that I’m procrastinating a task, the first question I ask myself is - How important is it to me? In his book the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, author Stephen R. Covey teaches us that all tasks fall somewhere on the spectrum of being either urgent or important, or both. He suggests that we get clear on our personal vision in order to prioritize Quadrant 2 activities
When I’ve decided that the task is importance (>8/10), I sit down to write out my answers to the following questions:
Why am I procrastinating (what am I avoiding/fearful of)?
What am I doing instead of the task? (how am I justifying avoidance or distracting myself with busy-ness)
What do I secretly want? (my vision for what happens with this task)
What do I need to DO to accomplish my vision? (list out in detail all the actions I need to take to make it happen)
How do I need to FEEL to do those things?
What do I choose to THINK to feel that way?
What baby step will I take right away?
What about tomorrow, the next day?
Please be sure to download the accompanying Procrastination Station PDF worksheet.
Being human
My mom brain has learned that experiencing fear and avoidance is just part of the human condition. Nothing has gone wrong. I can choose to step out of overwhelm (there’s too much to do), confusion (I don’t know how), worry (what if I fail).
Yes - the irony goddess is having a little chuckle at me as she sees me teaching about procrastinating, while procrastinating the writing of this article. I’m hoping to share in real time:
a) The power of allowing myself to be human in experiencing this discomfort and vulnerability;
b) Using my emotional superpowers to process these uncomfortable feelings;
c) Using my Procrastination Station coaching worksheet as a Jedi mindset dexterity tool to flip my thoughts and feelings into action.
Be sure to download this free coaching worksheet for yourself to try out, next time you are feeling a bit stuck in getting on with it,
Resources
Procrastination Station - iHealing Academy Worksheet PDF
Worksheet to help you work through what has you stuck in procrastinating, when you’re ready to get on with it already.